Hi
This is a funny problem I have trying to put into clear words.
I was the short kid in highschool and didn't finish growing until I was 22.

I've found I haven't felt too confident within social groups or large groups of people I'm always happy and confident when I'm just talking to one other person who I seem I can trust.

I try my friendships with people starting off on an honesty level but I can easily take a few steps back away from that friendship if I felt I have been lyed to.

I don't like it if im sitting in a class room and the person next to me is answering a question to the teacher & the whole room turns to look at the person I feel uncomfortable.

It's only been lately where I have thought I'm glad i have moved states & to meet a better group since I wasn't happy with the group(s) i was introduced to when I first moved away from my home state.

What's annoyed me since starting this course halfway through the year whilst the rest of the class have been together since Feburary I am the new kid on the block, there is a jealousy over what I have previously achieved making the course easier and I am being bullied about it. I have been sitting back patiently waiting for the rest of this class to pull their heads together but I don't think it will be too long until I introduce the institutes bullying policy.

When I walk into new groups I don't see the rush in finding out everyones life story immediately but when I'm put in new environments I do feel a little bit nervous not knowing anyone & how my first impression is going to be.

I was diagnosed with epilepsy last year which also makes me self concious if I seizure when I'm out with people or around people. I'm pretty much the quiet kid sitting in the class room now slowly getting to know people and not liking a few.

I would like to hear what you have to say, i'm wanting to be a lot more social i've taken this step of moving states to change my life.

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I tihnk you're very brave, and you should continue to be brave, and take small steps and get to know people. Don't be self-concious about your epilepsi. It's nothing to be embarassed about. If people don't want to be friends with you because you have epilepsi, they why would you want to be friends with them? Epilepsi isn't you, it's just a part of you.

Good luck :)

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You better get working on that. A lot of people have difficulty changing. If you don't fix it soon, you may never.

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This post made me grin because the OP just described myself—or how I used to be—to a tee. The only difference being that I was diagnosed with epilepsy when I was a toddler. You learn to live with it and it's hardly a burden, depending upon what kind of seizures you have and if you are able to control them with medicines like Dilantin (Phenytoin) or Depakote, or even a specific and highly regimented diet. It's never stopped me from driving a vehicle or even playing with my band on stage with strobe lighting (a common trigger of an epileptic episode) and better yet—during sex! While you should always make sure people around you know you have it so that if shit goes wrong and your neurons misfire, they'll know what to do, but don't let it govern your life. As for being shy, well, look at it this way: even if you're rejected in a social situation (girl, guy, friends, w/e) with every attempt you make you are drastically increasing your odds of success.

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Thanks for that guys, yeah it does make you a bit more self concious when you first start dealing with epilepsy.
I guess not too many people are brave enough to take steps on their own feet? ;)

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