Help me out guys. I met this girl a few weeks back, and she's just about to turn 16. I just turned 21. I met her through my brother, who is 19, and I heard from a few people that he kinda had his eye set on her, and I was just fine with this, as I have little to no interest in starting things up with him OR an underage girl. Unfortunately as the weeks have passed, we've hit it off really well, and let me make this EXPLICITLY clear: I was making absolutely NO moves on her whatsoever. Her attraction to me is purely natural. Anyhow she has told me many times now, at first discreetly and growing ever more blunt, that she prefers me over my brother. And sadly I feel something for her too, although a part of it is the protective feeling I would assume one feels for a sister (I have no sisters). And I suppose here would be the proper place to state that I have NO sexual motives here. I want to take her out to the movies, and go bowling with her and the like, and show her how a good guy should treat her. As far as I know she's had only one other boyfriend so far; that lasted about two weeks, never got serious and he was apparently cheating on her most of the time. Now some of you at this point might be saying to yourselves "bros b4 hos maaan…" but my brother - well he he's not a scumbag, but he does NOT treat women right. He's always chasing the youngest skirts he can get away with and he's been known to have girlfriends in like three different states at once, or openly hit on his GFs sister in front of her etc. As anyone replying should know full well, the end of your first serious relationship is ALWAYS a tough one, one that can leave you crying for weeks. I know that if she doesn't date me, she'll date my brother, and I also know he'll break her heart. I can't garuntee that I won't but I can say when we do break up, I'll be gentle as a kitten with her. So my problem isn't exactly "Do I steal this chick from under his nose?" so much as "If I do how should I handle this relationship with a MINOR, and still uphold the law?" That's my main dilemma right there, any help would be greatly appreciated, but I also want to hear ALL opinions on morals and ethics of the whole situation. Hell, if someone makes a strong enough argument, I'll throw the whole idea right out the proverbial window.

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@previous

The man is wise. Listen to him. Besides, 16 is no longer a naive and gullible age. So on your question. How do you uphold the law and a relationship with a minor…. Easy, don't fuck her. Pretty much sums it up. Honestly, if that is the entirety of your question the it is plain to see. If I was supposed to read something out of context then I am afraid you have lost me.

And for sake of perspective I would be somewhat more like your brother in this case. I am a manwhore.

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To be short and unbiased. Go for it, but don't break the law. Jail wasn't fun last time I checked.

Also, my parents have an age gap larger then 10 years. And although that hasn't worked out perfectly what problems their have been aren't from the age gap.

Lastly, I am only 17 with no experience in romantic relationships, but it seems to me that as you get older (starting at around 13) age differences matter less and less.

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When I was 20 I had a relationship with a girl of 14. I was also friends with her parents, which is a very important thing when you're dealing with a "nice girl" who's under the age of consent. I would not mess with anything sexual, even when she is of the age of consent, because there are too many things that can go wrong when you do that. You sound like a really nice guy, and I think you will do well with this girl. Go for it! And keep your creepy brother away from her!

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@previous

> Discuss it with her folks. Explain that you will be bound by their word and stick to that. Behave honourably at all times towards her as, at her age, it may well be just a crush.

You've gotten nothing but super input except with the "Discuss it with her folks" line. The ONLY condition I'd discuss it with her folks is if she thinks that would be necessary AND a good idea. A lot of parents prefer to pretend they don't know. By discussing it, you (a) make it seem like a big deal, (b) stop them from being able to stay in denial, (c) have to actually tell them how old you are, (d) get bound by some conditions that mess things up that you could have avoided by laying low.

Treat her nice, but remember, teen girls like a guy that feels a little dangerous too. Don't be so nice you're boring.

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