I'll attempt not to sound emo or whiny here. I've almost surely flunked out of college and lost a scholarship. NOBODY will hire me for ANYTHING.) Spotless legal record from a nice middle class family) Tired of having few friends and no dating life at all. Sick of failing at everything I do.

I am seriously considering 'flipping my own power switch' and am trying to at least tie up loose ends before I go. So far I've got the following=

1.Living will~~~Designate what's to be done with possessions. My family can sell or donate or give away most of my books and toys. What little money I have can go to pay their payments on the house. It's not a 'legal' will that would hold up in court but it's pretty well designated as my last wishes.
2.Messages to friends and family~~~Timed emails to friends and messages in #1 to family.
3.Funeral plans~~~I'll ask to keep it very simple and inexpensive, immediate family and nearby friends only to attend. The last thing I'd want is a huge affair that cost them a mint and involved lots of plans and travel for people.
4.Send out incomplete fanfic to friend~~~If he can't finish that it might at least inspire him. (majorly good author)
5.Pray for forgiveness~~~Call me crazy but I think The Man Upstairs could be a little ticked by my action.

I figured if there's anywhere I can ask for help without getting stupid, pat "Pleeeeze dont do it" responses it's here. Please don't disappoint me.

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You can download living wills for free that are 50-state legal. just google.

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Hey dude - i'm sure you're going through some tough times right now, but honestly…i've been down roads like that and things get better. Take some time to be with your family and friends, and realize how lucky you are to have a life…don't do it…please!

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You don't wanna hear it but it's true. Don't do it. If you have nothing to live for, why not really go off the wall and have some fuckin adventure or something?

Get some cash together and get yourself to an airport. Go anywhere. Go somewhere where no one knows you. Be someone else when you get there! Get lost and lose yourself then you will find yourself again. It is a beautiful world out there and if nothing's holding you back why not explore it?

Good luck and peace to you my friend.

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Please don't do it…if you do you might get sent back to this life and live a harder one! I would
live and deal with it. Things will get better eventually!

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Why do you hate life so badly? Is life that bad you feel to against your most basic instinct and off yourself makes us worried. Why don't you use this as insparation to better yourself? To stand up and say "fuck this" I WILL get out of this rut and do the best I can!

so you missed out on a scolarship? There are others, you have few friends? Ill be your friend, see you are dooing better already :D. You have few dates, well I can't really help you there cos I'm in the same boat. no one will hire you, if your ging to spend so much time figuring how to kill youself why should they hire you? You at least have a clean legal history (instead of getting suprise buttseks form a prison inmate. Otherwise, make it look like an accident, but make it certain, get hit by a truck. (Remember it doesn't count as sucide if another person does it!)

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According to your logic, everyone who never even attended a college, who has none or few friends and no dating life would have a reason to kill himself. This must be like far more than 20½ of the worlds population. Well, almost all of this things can be changed easily. You are healthy, I assume? Then, why don't you just try to enjoy life? This aren't reasons why you should kill yourself.

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@19,088

> If you have nothing to live for, why not really go off the wall and have some fuckin adventure

This inspires me.
As for the OP, if you REALLY decide to do it your list seems complete. Think about how to do it though, don't make yourself a retard and don't take a bystander out with you.

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College is a fucking joke. People should only go to college if they're an uber genius. It sounds like you're struggling. There is no shame. It took me 6 years of college and I still didn't get a fucking job. I did computer science at the University of South Florida. My bad.

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You are over planning. Just do it and stop being an attention whore.

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@19,088

Nice idea, but my spirit of adventure died years ago, a casualty of not being able to travel or do much exciting. And I'm very poor.

@19,095

Really? Well at least I did something right. That is the problem though…how to not leave a mess on the way out. I really really REALLY do not want to make my poor family find me with my face purple (hanging) or my head half blown off or splattered across a sidewalk in front of a high building. And don't worry, the last thing I'd want to do is take an innocent person with me. I'll make sure that doesn't happen.

@19,095

THANK YOU! At least SOMEONE here really understands!

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Hmm, okay. Screw the will, rob a bank, fuck a nun, get her pregnant, shoot up a school, fuck a baby, do anything and everything you can that society looks down upon.

Good Luck!

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@19,101

An hero appears?

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Ahh! Hello there. Another person who writes about doing something. You lack conviction. Not to be rude, but you easily could have done the deed in the time it took you to make your post.

Don't do it.

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Don't do it. Try to find a simple ass minimum wage job like a cashier at a grocery store or a janitor. Work for a month or two and then with that money saved up, go do something incredible.

Visit the Amazon rainforest
Go to Las Vegas
Take a Cruise with a close friend
Check out the sights in Tokyo, Japan
Relax on the beaches of Hawaii

There's so many great things to do on this earth and you really have to experience these things, man.

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Even though, I am probably younger than you. ( I'm only 18.) I've tried to commit suicide. ( I failed, LOLOL!!) I ended up in a mental hospital. I was only there for five days, but it was a living nightmare. You may think no one really cares about you, but you're definitely wrong. After I tried, and failed horribly, I realized that life isn't as bad as I thought. I would of hurt so many people. I have Bi-polar disorder and I have to stay on meds, or I'll try to harm someone, or myself.

Don't do it. Life will get better. College wasn't right for you, it's not right for everyone!

Like everyone is saying. Go visit somewhere really amazing.

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I understand your situation. I've been kinda thinking about doing it myself for quite a while; that's why I clicked on your thread. As someone said about you, "you lack conviction," well, obviously. Duh! Obviously you lack several things or you wouldn't be considering this. Obviously, you could have done it by now but that isn't really the point. I think it just takes a little time to consider. You want to consider it thoroughly and cover all bases beforehand. And that DOES include listening to people who say don't do it just in case there's anything they could say that would make sense or change your mind or whatever.

As for how to do it, a gun seems the easiest, quickest way. But that's pretty messy. I can understand not wanting anyone to find you like that. Personally, I'd like to just disappear first. But then, they'd be all out searching and would never give up hope until they actually found a body anyway. Plus, they may think you've just run away and are living a new life somewhere. Which, oh BTW, I've thought about doing too, but really, when you're miserable in one life you don't really relish the thought of putting in the effort to start another one that would suck just as badly or even worse, haha!

Sometimes when I look around at everybody passing by I think it's a wonder more people don't kill themselves. I mean, who wants to live until your body just decays around you anyway? It seems like it should be more of an acceptable option, especially for people who aren't very religious. Oh, I was at one time a very, VERY zealous Christian BTW but not anymore. I think it's all true, but only in a metaphorical way. And who gives a shit about metaphorical? I'm actually rather bitter about it now because I realize I wasted my best years pursuing something that most likely doesn't even exist in the first place, have little to show for it now, and no longer have access to the only things (read: young lovelies) that mean anything to me anymore. So good luck, haha! Who knows if we'll meet in heaven or hell or walmart or nowhere.

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> I've almost surely flunked out of college and lost a scholarship. NOBODY will hire me for ANYTHING.) Spotless legal record from a nice middle class family) Tired of having few friends and no dating life at all. Sick of failing at everything I do.

That sounds familiar… only instead of a few friends, I had NO friends. I did end up flunking out of college (even though I avoided the last semester of F's through a last second psychological leave), and I recall that moving out of my dorm and driving back home was one of the lowest moments in my life. I was completely alone and too ashamed of myself to tell anyone what was going on. (I asked people later what they thought of my disappearance and they simply assumed I graduated. I literally managed to disappear into thin air as far as they were concerned) At that point I hadn't even kissed a girl yet (and I also wasn't completely to terms with my bisexuality), but I had absolutely no one to confide in either. I thought that if I were to die, only relatives would attend the funeral because no one else gave a shit about me (the relatives being emotionally tied to me by default, or so I thought at the time).

I never did kill myself, but I did seriously want to die. I dunno why but I guess I've been all suicided out since middle school.

So what happened next? I got therapy. I applied for shitty retail jobs, and did get a call from Toys'r'us as a bike assembler, but they basically wanted me to magically be good at it without training, so they fired me. Then I started working for Kohl's, and thank goodness they have such low standards for employees. No one else wanted me (if all else fails, it's a shitty place to work, but it seems that Kohl's will hire just about anyone). But then somehow through therapy I managed to get some confidence back and started taking classes at a local state university. I managed to get readmitted to school a year after I had left. And it was slow and annoying, but I started to learn to be social. I made friends. And yeah I did lapse back into severe anxiety and depression from time to time, but overall it wasn't bad. And most importantly I had people I could talk to. The simple presence of someone you can take your pathetic little problems to, and he will take them seriously, is the closest thing to a godsend I believe in.

Now, though a combination of coincidence and talent, I will be starting a lucrative job in less than a week. Basically starting my career, finally, 3 years later than most people (who go to college right after high school and then immediately start work). While 3 years ago I was huddled up in my dorm room bed sobbing because I was a worthless loser no one cared about. OP, you are young, and shit can dramatically change in a rather short time.

I'm not trying to convince you out of your suicide… I just think it's completely fucking stupid for you to consider it, based on my own extremely similar circumstances. Get help. Talk to people. Fuck, TALK TO YOUR FRIENDS, THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE THERE FOR. I mean it's your life, you have the right to end it or whatever, but seriously if I can survive that shit so can you.

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hey, if you really think you should end it, dont hang yourself, drown, or an hero. all those ways are to normal and traditional. the way i would go out is the following
*this isn't recommended for those that haven't done drugs before*
1.take like 200 dollars and go and buy as many sheets of acid as you can
2. get yourself comfortable, pref in your room/house
3. leave notes/list to family/friends
4.Lick all sheets of ACID
5.Place licked tabs on chest directly over heart.
this will cause you to slowly, and painlessly slip into a hallucination filled world.m The more time goes by the harder your heart will be, but your mind to fucked to know it and therefor will result in cardiac arrest. sorry for the bad spelling. One of by good friends did this. And i dont think anyone else should tell you "yea, you should kill yourself/vice versa" this is your choice. but once its done, it cant be undone, so choose carefully. i hope the best for you even if that means death to you.

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A.S.H.

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> A.S.H.
?

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@19,112

How do you fail at commiting suicide? That would depress the hell out of me if I was that big of a failure.

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@19,135

Not a bad idea, but do it with magic mushrooms.

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@19,138

alt.suicide.holiday (wiki usenet if you're still confused)

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@19,142

I realized what I was doing was stupid, therefore I didn't really fail..

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if you think off'ing yourself will set you free you have something to learn its called humility. the saddest day you'll come across is when you learn that life goes on without you. so don't you think you should try to be part of the world instead of being selfish and yes suicide is selfish. people draw the line at suicide so dot expect sympathy…well what ever happens "Heres to Life"

-Sonata

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> not a bad idea, but i'd do it with magic mushrooms

this sounds good, but i've triend my damn hardest to OD on those things, just friend my brain for like 15 hoursthen went back to normal after a crash of 4 days of sleep. Acid, lsd or heroin would be the best options to OD on

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Panadol is 100% guaranteed to kill if you OD on it, even if someone finds you and gets you to hospital you're still fucked. Cheap as chips too (not that it matters if you're gonna die).

ANYWAY,

I do not support OP in his decision to kill himself.

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To all the people asking him not to do it; FUCK OFF.

He's obviously made up his mind, so leave him to it.

Suicide is a personal decision, and you should respect his wishes. Obviously, he feels that there's nothing else for him in this life. Also, life doesn't get better for some people, no matter how hard they try. Death is something that happens to everyone eventually, and personally, it's something that I look forwards to, and will embrace with open arms when it happens to me.

OP; Godspeed, and see you on the other side.

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lose some weight.
become gay.

if life is so valueless to you,
i suggest you loiter it everyway you can.

I'd join the circus and become a prostitute.
:D!

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If he was serious about it, he would have done it by now. And if he hadn't, then after all this time he definitely would have either got some help/changed his mind, or done it. So this is kinda pointless…

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Alright Anon, Reading your first post, I was brought to tears. I really was. Most of the time, I'm just a heartless "Do it faggot." but I've realized that that's not the point. I really do hope you find some inspiration to live. Maybe…Move to a different place, try something different, dont be so depressed. It's what i've done, and i'll tell you, fellow anon, It's worked great. I've never thought that I'd be this social, but hell, I am, and it's great. I was as depressed as you, and I had some of that stuff done, but I've changed, and I've branched out. I do hope you do the same.

Please, I'll tell you. Just reconsider, and ask you how your parents might feel, and even your friends. If you truly love them, then you probably shouldn't do it. They'll be torn apart just by you.

From across the world, I care about you.

Please, I know you've requested a "Don't do it." But just remember, I don't even know you.

I care.

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